Letter Re: Dad's Birthday

Day after we left Pacifica, my step mom followed up. I love children's commentary on the conversations we have when at their house, where poor artists are "losers" and my dad's favorite antique chairs are "pile of crap" and that having to use coasters on a walnut table is causing them "emotional distress". I love her letter, below.

Hi Snork baby,

Thanks for great pictures! I look terrible in them but the rest of you look great. I'll show the folks at Treasure Cove the mirror picture.

Pop had a fun birthday. He was so happy you called him, and Valentine called him. We walked down to Pacific's Chinese Restaurant to eat. Sasha and Frances were so upset about walking. They looked at each other incredulously and Frances said, "Do you know what this will LOOK like?" Sasha finished for her, "A FAMILY WALKING together?" They looked horror-stricken.

So we all followed Sasha, who led us through the yards (nowhere near where cars might pass and see us), through the back of the school, along the deer trail where we encountered a buck and a feral cat, and past the broken fence through which the pot-smokers crawl to avoid police--and we emerged from some pampas grass practically AT the door of the restaurant. The way back was more direct as it was dark and the likelihood of being seen was far less. Still the three little kids walked well ahead, with parents like two stalkers behind. All was well until Anastasia shone her new lazer-pointer party favor at a police car and they ran the rest of the way home, leaving us behind with the cop. He was busy setting up his speed trap so we got away this time.

Then Dave/Angela and Joey came for cake

So papa is officially fifty, and so happy that you all remembered him!

Too bad about the boobs on your form. Maybe you can get plastic surgery.

And you figured out the chandelier, how the pieces go. I never thought of that combination. I'm sure you've got it right! I'll be watching for those crystals. Maybe will have some left over from my other chandelier.

Love to you & Jessie. We'll see you in a few weeks!

~E

E is for Evil Stepmom, and she's really the best stepmom around. I got pretty lucky with my moms. (: