Week Five Hair Update (D-)

It is still disgusting.  Possibly, in a repel-people-on-the-subway kinda way.  Good thing I drive everywhere, if I still lived in Chicago, there'd be trouble.

So, there's this waxy crap in it.  ON it.  It coats the hair shaft.  I've mentioned it before.  It's invisible, but when I comb my hair, it imparts a residue on the comb, that would probably keep a flame going.  I'm steering clear of lighters and ovens, just in case.  Now, I *think*, the crap is working its way down the shaft.  I think I have also said this before, and it must be moving very slowly.  Or I'm just wishfully kidding myself.

So, I washed it Sunday, and by Wednesday night it was gross.  Uncharacteristically gross, even.  It seems it is outdoing itself.  More greasy that usual.  I read about these people who wash their hair once a week..  Well, mine would have up and *walked* away had I let it go another day.  But, it wasn't oily and stringy, as you would expect dirty hair to be.  It was waxy and clumped.  Like, if I wanted to make Pipi Longstocking braids, I could have, and I could fashion them to stick out perpendicular to my head.  No hair product needed.  It is most disturbing. 

I don't know if the picture conveys the horror.  It's very stiff to the touch.  You know, like things covered in wax.. 

I've taken to washing the hair itself, and not just the scalp.  It's not a recommended tactic, but I'm afraid the wax will make my pillowcases flammable.  So far, I can't tell the difference.  I *am* enjoying the Cammomille Lavender Soap.  I am trying it and a Shea/Cocoa butter one.  I love what the butter soap has done for winter skin -  I haven't used lotion, and my legs aren't all scaly.  But it doesn't smell like anything.  Or, may be it smells like butter?   It gets an A+ for function, but it doesn't make me a cup of tea and cuddle me to sleep.

The cammomille/lavender has an incredible soothing smell, that's not obnoxious and over pronounced, but not faint either, it fills the air and lingers, but gently, and has this nice, dense lather.   Really, everything about it, down to the little bits of dried camomille flowers is magical and awesome.  

The lather is a huge point with Jesse, who even tried it on his hair, twice now.  So, far he's even pleased with the results, even though he's spent the larger part of last month laughing at me.  He uses his 'manly' Axe/OldSpice shampoo or whatever for his face as well, and now he's replaced it with the Cammomille Bar.  I am secretly hoping that it sticks and he will be chemical free.  

It doesn't seem to leave any sort of film on Jesse's hair.  May be the wax needs a week or two to come out of the woodwork.  Scalps are sneaky.  Meanwhile, I think a boar's bristle brush would possibly get rid of my problem.  But I already ruined a bristle brush, and I feel for the number of boars this hair experiment will have wasted in vain. 

So, I'm *hoping*  that the nasty crud will have retreated another inch toward the bottom by this weekend.  I will say that the top of my head appears to be clean at all times, and when it gets waxy up on top, it's around the crown area.  But, even though it's all clean and fluffy up on top, it makes for a tragic, downright Shakesperean pony tail, all scraggly looking like a mangy wet dog.  *So* not hot. 

I guess right now I am waiting to see if it lets go.  I may go search for another bristle brush to defile.  I am curious to see if it would come back once it's gone - it appears NOT, since it's not getting waxy by the roots.  But it might.  The cruddy ponytail really speaks to me, all about giving up and indulging in a nice Pantene fest.  But I've read about so many people who succeeded.  They can't all be walking about with Candle Heads.  I work past the urge to cut off all but 4" of my hair.

The soap helps.  If I was still rubbing baking soda into my head, I've have called it quits.  It is not dry, it smells subtly like lavender, and there is no dandruff.  I still have not redyed my hair.  I am not sure that hair dye would penetrate the waxy crap.  And I don't want red tinted hair wax on my pillows.

Next time, I'll experiment with something funner, like kite surfing.  Sigh.


  1. I say it's time to start saving the wax and trying some sort of candle creation ;)

  2. Rom that was wrong in SO MANY ways.

    Snork, go check out my blog. I posted something for you there. :-)